Dear Chaps
As an experienced rugby professional, you already know that the reliable way to get ahead in your game is to perform excellently and to beat all performance expectations. To do this you need to work hard, develop your skills, and show wisdom and good leadership.
Hard work is up to you. You learn from the best: You know the right skills, You got the right training, and got the coaching you need, you can deliver an exceptional performance this week. But it's not just performance that matters here: You need to grow as a capable, well-balanced, happy person sharing in the fun.
For the weeks to come please look at the following aspects of your life:
Emotional Awareness: Understand what you’re feeling and why.
Perseverance: Whether you’re working toward an outward goal or on inner coping strategies, they’re all action-oriented -- trust in the process and don’t give up.
Internal Locus of Control: Believe that you, rather than outside forces, are in control of your own life.
Optimism: See the positives in most situations and believe in your own strength.
Support: While you tend to be strong individuals, you know the value of social support and must be able to surround yourself with supportive friends and family.
Sense of Humor: You’re able to laugh at life’s difficulties.
Perspective: Resilient people are able to learn from their mistakes (rather than deny them), see obstacles as challenges, and allow adversity to make you stronger. Find meaning in life’s challenges rather than seeing yourself as a victim.
Spirituality: Being connected to your spiritual side has been connected with stronger emotional resilience, especially if you're internally connected and not just going through the motions of attending services. (This doesn't mean that people who aren't spiritual can't be resilient, just that this connection has been found.)
Cheers for now
Sean Friedenthal
Friday, May 29, 2009
Thursday, May 14, 2009
4 Top factors in goal achievement!
4 top factors in goal achievement
If there is one question - or comment, actually, I get from players who have yet to start changing their thoughtand belief patterns is that many of them set goals... lots of goals.
Big goals. But don't achieve the biggies. Hardly any of them. Many have told me they've read mountains of goal setting books and listened to a boat load of tapes and CDs.
They got the steps down pat. They go something like this.
1- Identify the thing you want or what you want to achieve and write it down.
2- Write down all the reasons you want it, emotionally, spiritually, etc. What will achieving it give you, howwill you feel? This is for motivation.
3- Know your obstacles and challenges. Write down your limitations that might stop you.
4- Find out what you'll need to know/learn and find out where to get the help and who can help you... get theadvice, ask for help.
5- Put a deadline on when you want and expect to achieve the goal.
6- Create your plan... all the things that will need to be done to reach the goal.
7- Imagine yourself already having achieved the goal.
8- Keep going. Stick with it. Don't give up.
Right out of the book. "Goal Setting 101."
But in rugby and in life, 101 level knowledge doesn't cut it when you need 401 level skills.
And know this: When you have dreams, set goals and quit on them regularly, what happens is you get cynical. Even more than before, your self image becomes that of someone who loses. You see people who succeed routinely as "lucky." And your dreams usually die.
Depression is often a typical result.
I mean, after all, if there is no hope of achieving your biggest hopes and dreams, it's common to literally give upon yourself.
Self-esteem takes a battering. Daily. Because these goal setting steps above work pretty goodonly for people who are 100% committed.
For everyone else? Maybe 1 in 40 will accomplish much in more than one main area of life.
So what is the key... what is the secret to achieving nice, big, juicy, life-changing goals in MANY areas oflife?
Regularly?
Routinely?
There are a number of key factors. Your self image needs to change along with your achievement.
No change-a the self image means no change-a... period.
If you think of a goal and deep down believe, "That's not me," then guess what? It's not going to be you. No goal. Pack it up.
But when you can not only see yourself doing what is necessary and enjoy it, but truly identify with every part of what owning this accomplishment will mean to every part of your life, you are a thousand times more likely to stick with it.
When you think deep down, "I am (a great ____)," then your identity is now tied up in your success, and you are on the way to success.
You must be able to literally shrink down the size of the challenges in your mind. Yes, the brain can make tasks look big and impossible. And the brain can make tasks look small and ridiculously impossible. Same task!
When the job looks small and easy, confidence soars. This can make incredibly difficult jobs feel fun.Seeing mistakes, setbacks, delays not as problems but as inevitable, predictable steps along the path to reaching your outcomes. This isn't Pollyanna thinking. Achievers in all fields are ready for so-called "problems" and when they show up, they get excited to solve them instead of depressed and defeated.
Knowing the benefits of reaching a goal is not enough. To achieve very difficult feats, you must be able to spit out the benefits in your sleep... backwards, forwards, upside down and inside out. You need to make them attractive to you. You need to fall in love with the benefits. They need to be... motivating enough for you to give up many things, quite often.
Because when you are faced with choices and temptations to do things that go against you achieving your goals, if you are the slightest bit fuzzy on why you want a goal, you are going to choose wrong.And afterwards?
"Aw, who was I kidding?"
"That wasn't me."
"I guess I'm always going to be ____."
"That is for other people, not people like me."
And what are these?
Beliefs. Core beliefs.
Core beliefs that go deep, deep, deep.
And your potential gets smaller and smaller every time this happens. That's why simply writing down a few goals and spending a few scant specks of time on dreaming about them doesn't cut it.
Because thought habits and patterns are strong. They have momentum on their side. Life-long momentum. This is why people generally don't change much if at all after the age of 20.
People who set and achieve massive goals and continue to grow and grow and grow are foundationally different than people who are content doing the same things day after day after day. Ever wonder why the world greatest golfers, skiers, tennis players, rugby players, soccer and other top athletesare the greatest at their sports?
It's not physical training or real "hands-on" experience. That's a small part only.
What always, always, always sets the very best performers at any skill set is mental training.
Their massive success comes because they use mental training that is, most always, more effective than their actual physical training. Because the body follows what the mind tells it to do.
So if you have been frustrated because you want more from life but haven't been able to get it...If you have been angry because life isn't fair...If you've lost too often and have stopped trying...
If you don't believe you can achieve any more than you have...
You are missing out on the juice of life...Growth. The joy of massive accomplishment. Adoring admiration of others.
Confidence. Fame. Freedom. Peace of mind.
If you're stagnating and want more, Be a doer. Join the elite achievers.
If there is one question - or comment, actually, I get from players who have yet to start changing their thoughtand belief patterns is that many of them set goals... lots of goals.
Big goals. But don't achieve the biggies. Hardly any of them. Many have told me they've read mountains of goal setting books and listened to a boat load of tapes and CDs.
They got the steps down pat. They go something like this.
1- Identify the thing you want or what you want to achieve and write it down.
2- Write down all the reasons you want it, emotionally, spiritually, etc. What will achieving it give you, howwill you feel? This is for motivation.
3- Know your obstacles and challenges. Write down your limitations that might stop you.
4- Find out what you'll need to know/learn and find out where to get the help and who can help you... get theadvice, ask for help.
5- Put a deadline on when you want and expect to achieve the goal.
6- Create your plan... all the things that will need to be done to reach the goal.
7- Imagine yourself already having achieved the goal.
8- Keep going. Stick with it. Don't give up.
Right out of the book. "Goal Setting 101."
But in rugby and in life, 101 level knowledge doesn't cut it when you need 401 level skills.
And know this: When you have dreams, set goals and quit on them regularly, what happens is you get cynical. Even more than before, your self image becomes that of someone who loses. You see people who succeed routinely as "lucky." And your dreams usually die.
Depression is often a typical result.
I mean, after all, if there is no hope of achieving your biggest hopes and dreams, it's common to literally give upon yourself.
Self-esteem takes a battering. Daily. Because these goal setting steps above work pretty goodonly for people who are 100% committed.
For everyone else? Maybe 1 in 40 will accomplish much in more than one main area of life.
So what is the key... what is the secret to achieving nice, big, juicy, life-changing goals in MANY areas oflife?
Regularly?
Routinely?
There are a number of key factors. Your self image needs to change along with your achievement.
No change-a the self image means no change-a... period.
If you think of a goal and deep down believe, "That's not me," then guess what? It's not going to be you. No goal. Pack it up.
But when you can not only see yourself doing what is necessary and enjoy it, but truly identify with every part of what owning this accomplishment will mean to every part of your life, you are a thousand times more likely to stick with it.
When you think deep down, "I am (a great ____)," then your identity is now tied up in your success, and you are on the way to success.
You must be able to literally shrink down the size of the challenges in your mind. Yes, the brain can make tasks look big and impossible. And the brain can make tasks look small and ridiculously impossible. Same task!
When the job looks small and easy, confidence soars. This can make incredibly difficult jobs feel fun.Seeing mistakes, setbacks, delays not as problems but as inevitable, predictable steps along the path to reaching your outcomes. This isn't Pollyanna thinking. Achievers in all fields are ready for so-called "problems" and when they show up, they get excited to solve them instead of depressed and defeated.
Knowing the benefits of reaching a goal is not enough. To achieve very difficult feats, you must be able to spit out the benefits in your sleep... backwards, forwards, upside down and inside out. You need to make them attractive to you. You need to fall in love with the benefits. They need to be... motivating enough for you to give up many things, quite often.
Because when you are faced with choices and temptations to do things that go against you achieving your goals, if you are the slightest bit fuzzy on why you want a goal, you are going to choose wrong.And afterwards?
"Aw, who was I kidding?"
"That wasn't me."
"I guess I'm always going to be ____."
"That is for other people, not people like me."
And what are these?
Beliefs. Core beliefs.
Core beliefs that go deep, deep, deep.
And your potential gets smaller and smaller every time this happens. That's why simply writing down a few goals and spending a few scant specks of time on dreaming about them doesn't cut it.
Because thought habits and patterns are strong. They have momentum on their side. Life-long momentum. This is why people generally don't change much if at all after the age of 20.
People who set and achieve massive goals and continue to grow and grow and grow are foundationally different than people who are content doing the same things day after day after day. Ever wonder why the world greatest golfers, skiers, tennis players, rugby players, soccer and other top athletesare the greatest at their sports?
It's not physical training or real "hands-on" experience. That's a small part only.
What always, always, always sets the very best performers at any skill set is mental training.
Their massive success comes because they use mental training that is, most always, more effective than their actual physical training. Because the body follows what the mind tells it to do.
So if you have been frustrated because you want more from life but haven't been able to get it...If you have been angry because life isn't fair...If you've lost too often and have stopped trying...
If you don't believe you can achieve any more than you have...
You are missing out on the juice of life...Growth. The joy of massive accomplishment. Adoring admiration of others.
Confidence. Fame. Freedom. Peace of mind.
If you're stagnating and want more, Be a doer. Join the elite achievers.
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